we have a few weeks until the new year begins. this year should be a good year — many beginnings are planned. for instance, talks of moving in together seems solid. perhaps a possible engagement? i am about 6 months in at this new job. james has 2 years of school left, that’s 4 semesters and he’ll get his second bachelor’s in computer engineering. it has also been 5 months since my dad passed. i think about him sporadically and i miss him. i can still feel his presence and i find myself looking for him in his usual spot —-his place at the table, etc. mom still has his toothbrush out. and as of late, my new interest is to draw and paint and make things. shubear (my black manx cat) is officially mine for a year now. he was my christmas present last year. this year i asked for a heart shaped necklace. the engravings on the heart says, “fuck off.” i like it a lot.